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This is “izzat”? I’ll take the dishonor, thank you

Pakistan is a country where ‘Khandan Ki Izzat’ and ‘Log Kiya Kaheingy’ is more important then some ones life, dreams and happiness. Being a desi girl calls out for a lot of responsibilities; you are the brand ambassador of your khandan’s izzat and all your words and actions are taken against you.

‘Khaandan ki izzat’ is the most fragile thing. Your daughter marries someone inferior and you ‘wash hands off’ your khandan ki izzat! The sentiments of racial/religious groups have now surpassed this gold standard of fragility. Violent words like “Hamare khandaan mein yeh love-marriage shove-marriage sab nahin chalta hai!Yeh hamare khandaan ki izzat ka savaal hai” have become the staple these days.

Why the word izzat keeps buzzing in everyone’s mind, when they hear about women? Why does it matter so much that they are willing to rage against a much-loved star, willing to kill much-loved family members.

It’s ironical that in times where awareness is being spread to make it clear that women too have choices related to marriage, etc., there are poor victims who cannot stand up and fight for their rights because they are pressurized. Some may even speak, but their voices might not be heard behind the walls of their house and the parents turn deaf ears to them. I don’t understand that if parents want to see their child happy and if that particular goal is not being fulfilled, how does any of it makes sense.

“Unko maar daalne se kya tumhare khandaan ki izzat badh jayegi?”

Well, the point that I am trying to make is that, forced marriages are prevalent in the 21st century and it needs to be stopped. Parents have to understand that a woman is not a dress, a pen or any material that can easily be compromised with.

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